Yeah, I really struggled with the tagline this week, leave me alone. It’s a bumper end to the month with eight more hits recorded alongside the Drop 40’s Michael Tilson Thomas. April 22nd in particular gets a bloodbath of four names for the Stats Zone hall of fame!
Music
Dave Mason’s not Feelin’ Alright anymore, having passed away at the age of 79 after two years of unspecified health problems. A founding member of the rock group Traffic, he had what might charitably be described as a complicated relationship with the other members of the band, going through a revolving door of quitting, rejoining and getting fired again. They kept touring together intermittently but he later went on to state “On one level, I could hate every one of them”. Charming.
He had a very successful solo career over in the States, despite getting into constant legal battles with multiple record companies. Mason’s biggest hit was 1977’s platinum-selling Let it Flow, and he recorded multiple songs that went gold too. He nets seven points for four teams, and leaves only Steve Winwood standing from Traffic’s original lineup.
Our other musical hit this week is the classical pianist, Ruth Slenczynska. She was a prodigy on the piano, though this came with horrifically abusive practice regimes from her father. She fortunately overcame it later in life and went on to a successful performing career, even releasing an album at the age of 97! Two teams take four points.
Politics
We have three this week, all United States politicians. Former Governor of Hawaii, George Ariyoshi was the first to go, passing away at the age of 100. Ariyoshi was the first Asian-American to serve as a U.S. State Governor, and held the role for a record 13 years.
In David Scott’s case, it would be more accurate to say his body has finally caught up with his mind having died years ago. Scott served as one of the representatives for Georgia, having been in office for 23 years at the time of his death. He’d even been confirmed as a candidate for this November’s mid-terms despite being 80, wheelchair bound, needing to read from a script and constantly being on the verge of dozing off. He was whisked away from the building as soon as he was confirmed, though it’s unclear if it was to avoid media scrutiny or just to get him back to the home in time for his Jell-O. The Democrat becomes a unique hit for theme team Dying Donkeys, and combined with Ariyoshi nets them a solid fourteen points.
On the other side of the floor, Republican Dirk Kempthorne served as both a Senator and Governor for Idaho, as well as in cabinet under Bush Jnr. as the Secretary for the Interior. He wasn’t very popular with environmentalists in this role, and also faced criticism for managing to splurge over $200,000 of tax-payers money renovating the office bathroom. Ironic then, that it was his bowels that proved his undoing, dying after a year long fight with colon cancer. Seven points for four teams, including former champion and current committee member Banana.
Science
Desmond Morris was the most popular hit this week, getting five points for fourteen teams and also featuring over on the Deathlist. He was a zoologist and nature documentarian, serving as Grenada TV’s answer to one David Attenborough. His thesis was on the reproductive behaviour of the ten-spined stickleback; aka fish sex. Someone’s got to learn these things I guess. He also wrote several books over the years, the most famous being The Naked Ape in 1967. It was a smash hit, selling over 20 million copies, but has also long been criticized for it’s rampantly misogynistic approach to human evolution and nature. Oh, and he pursued surrealist painting for a hobby.
So to sum the man up, he studied sex, wrote about sex, and painted weird stuff that was no doubt somehow about sex. Freud would have loved this guy.
Sport
Fulfilling our “footballer succumbs to Alzheimer’s” role this week is Tony Parkes, the Blackburn Rovers club legend. He joined them in 1970 as a midfielder and spent the rest of both his playing and coaching career with them, experiencing a journey from the lows of League 2 to being Premier League champions in 1994. He was never actually trusted with management full-time mind, acting as a caretaker seven times in total, including a short spell at Blackpool. The seven points he nets for several sports theme teams are permanent at least.
Television and Radio
Elsie Kelly finishes us off this week, an actress most well known for playing Noreen Maltby in ITV’s Benidorm for nine of it’s ten seasons. She’s a unique hit for British comedy theme team The Retched pong of Brit sit-com, scoring ten points.
Scores
| Name | Age | Date of Death | Teams and Scores |
| Dave Mason | 79 | April 19 | 4 Teams 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 = 7 Points |
| George Ariyoshi | 100 | April 19 | 2 Teams 💀💀💀💀= 4 Points |
| Desmond Morris | 98 | April 19 | 14 Teams 💀💀💀💀💀= 5 Points |
| Elsie Kelly | 89 | April 21 | The Retched pong of Brit sit-com 💀💀💀💀💀💀+👻 = 10 Points |
| David Scott | 80 | April 22 | Dying Donkeys 💀💀💀💀💀💀+👻 = 10 Points |
| Tony Parkes | 76 | April 22 | 4 Teams 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 = 7 Points |
| Ruth Slenczynska | 101 | April 22 | 2 Teams 💀💀💀💀= 4 Points |
| Dirk Kempthorne | 74 | April 24 | 4 Teams 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀 = 7 Points |
So, to our monthly review of the podium positions.
Pretty Noose‘s time at the top now reaches two months and they extend their lead by six points, giving them a cushion from the increasingly unlikely looking possibility of a Peter Rhodes QO. For the remaining spots it’s a three way tie between DDP Tofoa, Shaun of the Dead 69 and The Sound of the Underground. All four teams had a quiet month, only netting the Drop 40 hit of Michael Tilson Thomas.
For the theme teams, our German cheerleader Deutschland verabschiedet sich! remains at the top of the table on a comfortable 48 points, though will certainly be hoping Mario Adorf’s lack of a QO so far won’t come back to bite them. Musical themed LW’s Latest Hit trails behind on 35 in second place, and just this week Dying Donkeys pair of deceased Democrats have moved up them up to bronze.