Born 16 September 1947 (Chester, Cheshire, England)
Comedian and actor. Born Russell Roberts, he was voted "funniest man on television" 5 times. If he was the funniest, then we'd hate to see who was the unfunniest. Also Pipe Smoker of the Year 2001, which might be more relevant to the DDP.
Born 27 September 1953 (Paddington, London, England)
MP for Hackney North & Stoke Newington since 1987. Once a candidate for the leadership of the Labour Party. Previously a familiar face on TV political shows, e.g. This Week (2010-15). Caused conniptions in 2019 by drinking a canned mojito on a train.
Born 28 December 1967 (East Grand Forks, Minnesota, USA)
The original performer of the Utah Jazz's mascot, the Jazz Bear, who spent almost 25 years dunking and doing tricks before being fired for management disputes.
Retired footballer and coach. Among other clubs coached Everton de Viña del Mar, two stints. (Notto be confused with a UK Merseyside club of a similar name). Also coached the Chilean & Bolivian National teams.
Maltese politician who won four General Elections serving two terms as Prime Minister and then became the island's 7th President . Pro-Europe, he was instrumental in Malta joining the EU.
The Dilbert guy, who drew over 12,000 comic strips before being cancelled in 2023 for calling black americans a "hate group". Is terminally ill with prostate cancer and wants Donald Trump to help him.
Danish crime fiction writer who has sold over 27 million copies worldwide. Best known for the "Department Q" series of books, which got adapted into a Netflix series in 2025.
Born 9 January 1958 (Ismailli, Hekimhan, Malatya, Turkey)
Turkish gunman who attempted to kill Pope John Paul II in 1981. Served 10 years for an assassination attempt on someone else that actually did succeed, released in 2010.
Terrorist who killed 17 people after bombing a café in Marrakesh. Was sentenced to death and is currently in solitary confinement after trying to kill his cellmate.
American biochemist, co-authored the landmark textbook "Molecular Biology of the Cell". Was also the former president of the National Academy of Sciences (1993–2005).
Hailing from Charleston, South Carolina, she was a contestant on Survivor 41. As you no doubt all remember, she was as the weakest link of Luvu, and she worked with Erika Casupanan to crack the majority alliance. They were successfully able to turn the f
Second man on the Moon, who has always claimed he'd have been the first if it wasn't for the fact that the only door of the lunar lander was on Neil Armstrong's side.
Current right-back for England and Real Madrid. Once beloved in Liverpool for helping them win the league and the Champions League, but lost their support after his transfer to Spain.
Born 19 October 1954 (Dudley, West Midlands, England)
Gum-chewing, headpiece wearing, bung-taking (Allegedly - at the DDP lawyer's request) football manager, who likes his teams to play dirty, unattractive football. Formerly at Bolton & Newcastle United.
Former head of the Republican Guard and member of Saddam Hussein's family. Currently awaiting execution for war crimes and crimes against humanity in the Anfal trial. Born in 1939 or '40.
Born 29 July 1939 (Campos dos Goytacazes, State of Rio de Janeiro, Brazil)
Amarildo Tavares da Silveira, is a retired Brazilian footballer who played as a centre forward. He is the last survivor of the winning Brazilian 1962 FIFA World Cup team.
Batsman who has the highest ODI average of any England cricketer to have played more than five times. Also one of only two cricketers to have hit a century in both their first and last ODIs.
Former Aston Villa winger, place in the history books probably comes down to him being the first ever substitute brought on by Manchester United (replacing George Best in the 1965 Charity Shield).
Second son of Queen Elizabeth II. Married to Sarah Ferguson from 1986 to 1996. Shunned by society for attending too many sketchy parties on and off Jeffrey Epstein's island
Born in Cleethorpes, Lincolnshire, England (exact date unknown)
Sarah Ferguson's ex-maid. Serving a life sentence for the murder of her boyfriend, she ended up on a life support machine after a suicide attempt in October 2003. Born 1967.
Model, self-proclaimed actress and most popular blonde in Los Angeles. Nearly nothing is known about her. Seems to be born in Poland or Idaho (where's the difference?). We only know her favourite car: a pink Chevrolet. Born either 1958 or 1938!
New Romantic singer - a pin-up in his heyday, but now old, overweight and suffering from depression. Was detained under the Mental Health Act in 2002 after throwing a car alternator through a pub window.
Bassist and vocalist for the comedy pop-rock band The Barron Knights. Reached Number 3 on the UK charts with "Call Up the Groups" and "A Taste of Aggro."
American politician who served two terms in the Texas House of Representatives, changing from a Democrat to a Republican. Later represented Texas for 30 years in the US House of Representatives.
Nigerian cardinal of the Catholic Church, former prefect of the Congregation for Divine Worship and one of the principal advisors of Pope John Paul II.
Singer-songwriter best known for her hits 'Love and Affection' and 'Drop the Pilot'. An alleged affair with Blue Peter's Valerie Singleton is the stuff of myth and legend.
Former cyclist, 7 times winner of the Tour de France, who overcame brain, lung and testicular cancer. It was revealed in 2012 that he was a systematic drugs cheat all along and now enters into sporting infamy.
Born 14 June 1932 (Springfield, Massachusetts, USA)
Sheriff of Maricopa County, Arizona. A controversial figure, accused of abusing his powers. Became famous for accusing Barack Obama for having forged his birth certificate during his first election 2008. Sounds a bit like a Jealous Joey.
English rhythm guitarist who co-founded Oasis and played with them until 1999. Rejoined them for their 2025 world tour but took a temporary break due to prostate cancer treatment. Nicknamed "Bonehead".
Iranian Azeri woman sentenced to death for adultery, in legal limbo for many years now. This pick will not count if it is death by execution, making this pick fairly useless. Born 1967
Born 6 February 1966 (Newton-le-Willows, Merseyside, England)
Shy and retiring singer who had phenomenal success with the hit single 'Never Gonna Give You Up', the biggest selling UK single of 1987. Later became a phenomenon of a different kind as that single became part of an internet meme known as 'Rickrolling'.
Former footballer, manager and pundit. Renowned for his eclectic style of commentary, for example "'There's a few tired limbs in the blue legs" and "van Nistelrooy, predating as usual...". Got a bit too eclectic with some racist remarks and was sacked.
American attorney and public servant who was LBJ's top domestic aide in welfare policies, as well as Secretary of Health, Education, and Welfare under Jimmy Carter.